感谢老天！

今天，请你凝神屏息，严阵以待，因为，我终于脱离苦海了！世界万千，我黄百升，把心一横，把锅铲高举，将那个无良毒辣、狠心绝意、双手沾血、吃人吞骨的老板娘，炒她鱿鱼了!  哈 ！ 哈~ ！我疯了！我疯了！！！

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啊！~ ~ 啊！~ ~ 你们听到了没有？听到了没有？我那凄厉的叫声？每当深夜降临，夜幕低垂也好，万家灯火也好，虫鸣鸟叫也好，我的双手开始不自由主的颤抖，什么惊弓之鸟，什么心有余悸，什么毛骨悚然，统统都可以在同一个时间一起涌上。对于这份惨绝人寰的工作，掏人心肺，你可以想象，我双膝跪地，双手高举，拿的是我的五脏六腑，鲜血淋漓。如果你还可以想象，我是从一个炼狱里走来，背后拉长了没有灵魂的黑影，双脚不着地的飘离。

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如果我的四肢不能动弹，请将我从万丈深谷抛下，让我无止境的往下坠，因为我已学不会了挣扎； 如果我双目失明，把我荒置于断崖峭壁，让万虫啄噬，因为我看不到了逃跑的方向； 如果我声消音灭，让我在汪洋中漂流，给鱼只果腹，因为我没有了呼救的能力。如果我失去知觉，让我在荒漠中暴晒风干，因为我丧失了闪避的反应。

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但是，就因为我还可以挣扎、逃跑、呼救和闪避，所以我才要非将这份工辞退不可！

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（如果你不靠这么文雅的形容词想象，那么请你到我的跟前来，我现现实实地用世俗粗话说给你听！鸡败！）

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ok, 无论怎样，我还是出来了，我真的是不能想象我是怎样做这份工的！你不是我，你真得不能体会到，我不要讲它是辛酸，但是，隐隐约约，不是你从外头看进来的风光简单。

i've updated my photo album in friendster.

Check it, m8s. after thousands times struggles in my heart, i decided to quit the job today, i want to tell her this is another massive and ever great disaster after the bomb blasting in Central London.

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p/s: for those who email me about my situation here in London, thank you guys. i appreciate it very much.

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p/s 2: pls go to check the latest photo, this is the easiest way for me to up load those hard memories.

i'm so tired. honestly.

when i write a blog, there's an intension in telling my friends about my life here, although there are a lots of complaints and unsatisfied matters. sometimes, the story is sad and upsetting. but, i like it this way to express myself and let somebody who's cares about me know what am i doing at the moment. i always look at the sky above, you can see the cloud moving, sometimes dark sometimes bright. and i was hoping, hoping something different will change and bring goodness. i'm so afraid of worsen consequence will turn up and makes me feel horrible.

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i don't know how to imagine, as me and myself, live in this kind of life, like a prisoner who give up his freedom and soul and everything to pay to the devils. people say: this is life. Oh... whatsoever. i'm about to move on, should get something done and stand tough in any other way.

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i chat with a guy today, he is from Colorado. he said, England is 15 yrs backwards compare to the states. and i agree with him, he showed me few statistical figures saying that England just a shit in some perspectives like economics and the educations systems. and some more in their chaotic political world. and when i just live in a city like London and last year in Liverpool. after i watched their tv programs. i am so agree that England is just a shit.

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p/s: i got your comment, kai san. looking forward to meet you in London.

i'm from hell

sometimes, you just can't play with your mood, sometimes you just too busy to care about your mood. i don't even feel myself when i just so unconciously doing the things that i hate. this is true, no one can deny or defeat it. and i, right now, started with a very bad unlucky day, when i was just about to leave the hell's door, the sky opened up and poured some fucking rain on my fucking shoes. i hate it, i really hate it. i tried to reach this lousy cyber cafe, once i just stepped in side and met those bitches waitress, the rain just stopped! clean and fucking clear i can see from inside through the big glass windows. Oh God, fire burn inside of my heart and i can feel the heat just burning every inches of my skin! i wish it just Boom! Fuck!

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About the fucking bitch employer again, Oh...i've got nothing to say about her anymore. she just giving me headache and tiring me. last week i don't know what's wrong with her, she don't pay my salary on time, deliberately delayed a week after the supposing date. hell yeah! i know what she is doing, tried to make me suffer and fasten my belt. Oh no! no way! i won't give her a chance. haha! i started to remind her, let her know is the time to pay me otherwise i will just keep on drive her nuts! this is mad.

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tell you what, English's weather is so crazy! they definately can get four type of stupid seasons in a day. can be spring, summer, fall and winter just keep on  switching time to time. silly, isn't it? i'm really sick of it. what a weird!

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i play quite an importand role in the take away shop right now, they can't easily sack me off, because i know every single thing in their shop, i manage to work it out without the existence of the bitch employer. So, eventually, she started to gone mad and skying all the time she can. Oh no, she just put herself in a very unsafe situation. she depends on me too much, she ain't care about her business, she just make fun of it, one day for sure her business will definately shut by her ownself.

i always thinking about to leave the job

How are you all? i'm Bai Sheng, Her.... i still live in Perivale, London. This is the the accommodation provided by the fucking employer, my employer is a lady , she is about 30ties, married, and have husband in China. However, i'm so busybody and heard that she got kids but don't have the close relationship with her husband nowadays. So, she decided to have an affair with a chinese guy here . they are both applied to be a refugee and seeking protection from the UK gov. But, i really have no idea how they get all the process done.

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this bitch, is really a bitch. i hate her alot. scolded me coz i can't really help her in the fucking kitchen , and i'm just the role of fucking counter boy infront of her fucking door to take the orders from door coming customer and receiving telephone orders. she tenant out her upstaires rooms to some other fucking chinese from the fucking China using their own stupid local language which only ghost can understand, eventually, i was alienated.

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To be continued..... (i'm off to the fucking job right now, can't write anymore longer, sorry to all my friends in the usage of vulgar language, but i think it is appropriate to use it that way).

My contacts in London.

To all my dear friends:

ICQ:

Yahoo! Messenger:

MSN:

Skype:

Friendster:

My mobie phone (Vodafone) ( '+' sign can be replaced by double zero - 00)

My mobie phone (This number available on weekends only)

If you have anything wish to send it to me, please mail it to the address below:

This is life.....

to all my love friends, i can't type in Chinese characters. So, please forgive my poor english. i'm working in a take away shop for chinese food. i work seven days a week and half day for fucking rest. i'm trying to be cool, hope whatever become just don't too worst for me. God Bless! you could send me English msg to my handphone. Cheers!